The pros and cons of being friends with benefits

by LotteLust
friends with benefits

Friends with benefits is no longer an unknown concept. Some swear by it, others don’t like it at all. For people who don’t need a relationship, it is the perfect way to get their money’s worth. Still, there are a few things to consider before becoming friends with benefits with someone!

Advantage 1: you know each other well, also under the covers

You literally have the benefits but not the burdens. When you have sex with the same person for a longer time it is nice to learn what you like. One of the reasons that a one night stand is usually not the best sex is because you don’t know each other’s body at all. After having sex with your friend with benefits (fwb) a few times, you probably know all too well what makes the other person horny. This allows you to have really good sex where you can respond well to each other’s desires.

Advantage 2: you have the freedom to flirt and sleep with other people

Do you have a sweetheart in every town or do you want to go home with someone after going out? No problem! You can have a fwb and have a good time flirting. Unless of course you have agreed to only have sex with each other. It is up to you whether you want to, or if you prefer freedom. It can be especially nice that you have a permanent person with whom you have sex and also discover new people.

Advantage 3: you dare things in bed you might not dare in a relationship

Maybe you have sexual fantasies that you would not dare to tell a partner in a relationship or one night stand. When you are fwb with someone this can feel completely different. You may be less afraid that the person in question won’t like your ideas and it will be easier to really open yourself up to new things. A fwb is therefore perfect if you would like to experiment in the sexual field.

Disadvantage 1: easier said than done

You are friends and have sex with each other. It sounds very simple, but this can sometimes be disappointing. There are several reasons for this. It is very important that you set your limits very clearly. Do you only have sex with each other or do you set each other free so that others can also come into play? When you decide to only have sex with each other, you are actually exclusive and it can look like a relationship. Is that what you want right now? Therefore, think carefully about it.

Disadvantage 2: one of the two falls in love

Although your approach at the beginning of your adventure was probably to have the benefits but not the burdens, you have no influence on your emotions. It often happens that one of the two falls in love with his or her fwb. It’s not nice to have a broken heart or to break someone’s heart. If this creates an uncomfortable situation, it can cause your friendship to change drastically. Is it worth that?

Disadvantage 3: it can have an impact on your confidence

It can of course give your self-confidence a huge boost if you have someone with whom you can always have sex. It can make you feel very sexy to know that someone is longing for you. However, this also has a downside. You may know from your fwb that he is not interested in a serious relationship. This may confuse you. You may think you get scared that you are not nice enough or that there is something wrong with you. Feeling that someone thinks you’re good enough for sex but not for a relationship can be very bad for your confidence. Of course you know that this is not the approach of the person with whom you have sex, but these uncertainties can always arise. Don’t worry: you’re gorgeous, sexy and a total catch!

Image: unsplash


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